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05 August 2009

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A dear friend's son married a pretty woman. She was touchy, and my friend kept a low profile, only surfacing to do things like buy them vacation trips and BUILD THEM A HOUSE. My friend was always treated horribly by the wife, but she loved her son so just kept quiet.

After many years the wife had a baby. She never exhibited any maternal feeling and he did everything as she never cooked, or did any baby-type work, and ran up miles of debt as she was never home. She had to work very late every day. He did everything for the child.

He accidentally discovered she was having an affair when he looked at a saved message on her phone. The man was sending her pictures (of intimate physical details, shall we say); it was someone at her work that he knew.

The son tried to continue, but after a while they separated. The court ordered that a number of conditions be met, such as she would live in the house (see above) with the baby but was not allowed to remove anything. She did the opposite of every court order she was meant to obey.

She immediately moved everything (washer, stove, furniture, anything not nailed down) out of the house (and went to special trouble to take my friend's son's professional certificates needed for his job and other things she wanted as potential weapons). She moved in with her parents so they would look after the baby. She broke up with the boyfriend.

She got a new boyfriend. A very young one (she's in her late thirties). The old boyfriend's wife, who had not been aware of the transgression, stumbled across a trove of photographs on their computer. Let's say "action photos." She was livid. She emailed the lot to my friend's son, who was upset anew. He forwarded them to his lawyer.

The son only cares about getting equal custody - he'd love more, should it be given. He has lost a great deal and so has my friend, and the icing on the cake was the house being gutted and going into foreclosure - she wouldn't pay a portion of any bills (house bills, daycare, credit card, etc.). The baby had daycare paid by the son but she would do things like not bother to take him. She wouldn't agree to sell the house, opting, I suppose, to do the maximum damage instead. The son and my friend care only about the baby. She's spent what she had to help her son, and will consider it all worth it if they get the baby at least half time.


posted by - 8:57 PM

Men are stupid *shrugs*

Although it's not entirely their fault - the nature played a nasty trick on them. They have a penis but for it to work, the blood has to leave the brain :-)
It's not hard to fall in love with someone who will, once they have their claws in you, make your life a living hell. People don't necessarily reveal all until it's too late. In my case I think I was to blame since if I'd looked dispassionately at things I'd've run a mile. As it was it didn't take me long to figure it out, but by then a lot of damage had been done.
nature's goal is reproduction which probably accounts for love being blind.
In my case, I was deeply confused and lacking in self-esteem, and the Ex manipulated me. As the old saying goes, "if I had known then what I know now ..."
so is it better to have someone arrange marriages, maybe someone with no interest in the matter, like a computer
I concluded long ago I'd've had a better time in an arranged marriage.
Any chance I can see the pictures? I'm not HBA, honest. Erm...

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