Frustration
Frank: Do you ever feel frustrated?
Me: Every once in a while.
Frank: Maybe that's a flash of enlightenment.
Me: What do you mean?
Frank: You have a lot of frustration.
The last time I saw Frank he remarked that I have tons of frustration and should 'let it go,' so I've spent the past few days pondering frustration. I realise it isn't just that I don't know how to 'let it go,' but that I don't know what 'let it go' means to begin with.
Given my current diminished state where exactly nothing is easy and everything is a struggle, I have a vast sea of frustration that I ignore 24 hours a day. I ignore it and I keep struggling and if I fail I don't spend time in sorrow but just begin again.
If I had a few things causing frustration I could just not do those things. Since my frustration is a by-product of my persistence which in turn is what keeps me alive I'm unsure what 'let it go' means.
What was it Dave used to say? 'Easy is now hard' or something.
About the only thing I can think of that I'm doing to dampen or more accurately not raise my frustration is NOT buying another desktop pc as I just don't want to add to my feeling of being trapped.
Labels: Cogitation, Feelings woe woe woe
posted by
- 5:00 PM

Comments:
there's letting go, ignoring, and suppressing.
it's a challenging practice trying to feel the difference!
it's a challenging practice trying to feel the difference!
Well, there's frustration when you can't open a jar lid and frustration when you have to endure years with one hand. There nothing to power through with the latter. My body is like a broken machine still running: making it go faster or run harder isn't really possible.
I'm sorry I sound blankly despondent. I appreciate any input and do spend time thinking about it all.
I'm sorry I sound blankly despondent. I appreciate any input and do spend time thinking about it all.
It seems quite normal to be frustrated with loss of mobility and control. The energy coming into you is the same, your thinking is clear, yet your body is slowly failing you. I would be horrendously frustrated too. Please know you have my constant empathy and good wishes. The rest of us can only imagine the extreme nature of your difficulties.
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PLZ LEEVE A MEZZAGE KTHNXBAI